i am ailuj.

Finding your un-comfort zone.

And here is the secret to becoming smarter and getting better at everything you want to get better at.

Being humble.

“Thing is, I’m not that smart. And I never have been, really. I’m also not a very good writer. Or very funny…”

Working hard.

“I’ve known all of this for a long time. I’m a quick learner for many things and a dedicated worker, so I’m able to get by pretty well, but when it push comes to shove, I’m a bit slow to get noticeably better at things…”

 Push yourself.

“Seek out people who challenge you, question you and make question yourself.”

Allow yourself to not be the smartest in the room, so you can learn something.

“Be ok with feeling like you don’t know what you’re doing. In fact, that’s a good sign you’re on the right track—that you’re learning.”

Rinse and repeat.

My dog is making me more productive

About a month ago, we began fostering a one year old, golden retriever / lab mix named Penni. Picked up off the streets (thug life), scheduled to be put down by the pound and then rescued by Red Collar Rescue, we quickly fell in love with her mystery and her personality. A few weeks ago, we officially adopted her.

Since then…our schedules have been different and a little hectic in the transitioning period. Walks in the morning, walks at lunch, runs in the afternoons, taking shoes away from her so she doesn’t chew when she’s bored. She requires a lot of attention but naturally like Wade Foster mentioned in his article, she enforces a schedule, forces breaks and so much more. 

I wake up earlier. This was a new year’s resolution that I was failing at before Penni. The transition has been a little rough, but the benefits have been great.

I walk / run around more. Obviously, important to health. I even take long walks most days at lunch with her now, which is great for a change of scenery from my cube and the computer I sit at most of the day.

I leave work on time. I’m out around 5:30 every day now. I’m forced to get things done more efficiently and also leave work…at work.

I play. I’ll quote Foster here,

“For [her], every day is awesome and [she’s] just excited to be around you.”

Penni’s (and most dog’s) personality and attitude are contagious. When we’re with her, we play, we chase, we jump.

More of all of this, less of everything else, please.

Beginnings of meditation

Lately I’ve been contemplating trying out meditation. My internet heroes seem to be trying it out and I’m seeing it everywhere as a means to de-stress and feel lighter. 

The last few days I’ve been on the edge - anxious, tired and stressed. A combination of being pretty slammed at work and feeling like I’m not fulfilling personal goals and progress quick enough, I’ve just been all over the place it seems.

Considered getting back into Bikram, which sounds awesome but it’s time consuming and expensive. So I turned to meditation this evening. I set the timer on my phone to 5 minutes, thinking it would be too long for me to sit still. I closed my eyes, tried to focus on breathing and nothing. And then I jumped…I had become startled by the timer going off. Quickest 5 minutes of my life. And next thing I knew, I had hammered out three paragraphs of a blog post I’ve been needing to get started on. The three paragraphs aren’t great, but first drafts never are. The point is, my head felt clearer and more ready to get words and thoughts down.

It’s too early to say that this may work wonders for me, but tonight was a really great first experience.